Wednesday, 25 July 2012

Speechlessness..


The characters in the conversations are married to each other. P, the better-half (the woman) and J, the other half (the man).

P: Do I look slim in this dress?
J: Can I be honest?
P: No.
J: You look like an hour-glass.
P: Ok. Honesty is the best policy.
J: Plump.
P:
******************************************


P leaves for some work.
P: Bye. Mwaaaah...
J: Kiser? Joynogor er?
P:
*******************************************

P returns.
P: Wassup?
J: Now that you are here, you know what is up. (winks)
P:
******************************************
P: Hey you remember that first time we met?
J: Of course. How can I forget that? (sarcasm to be ignored)
P: Tell me what was I wearing?
J: Nailpolish.
P: what was I WEARING?
J: Earrings.
P: I am not Kate Winslet.
J: Oh that reminds me. I had better things to check about you. Sorry didn’t notice what you were wearing.
P:
**********************************************
P (singing loudly): “subhah hone na de ..shaam hone na de…ek dusre ko hum sone na de”…what do you think of the song? I love it.
J: It reminds me of our suhag-raat.
P:
P:
J: Lights off. Sounds off. Camera off. Action! (evil grin follows)
P:
*****************************************************

P (after watching Kahaani): I wish I was Vidya Balan.
J: You don’t need to. I find you better.
P:
P:
P: You sure? Or you drunk?
J: Sure. I mean she is way more beautiful and all. But it’s like, Beer works better for me on a June-afternoon, than a Blue label. Like that.
P: Whatever that means.
J: It means facts. Tui abar compliment bhebe phelish na. (Don’t mistake it as a compliment).
P:
P:
*****************************************************
P trying a dark eye make up, a.k.a smoky look.
P: How do I look?
J: You look like Johny Depp.
P: Whaaaat??
J: Johny Depp. In “Pirates of the Caribbean”. (concentrates on the newspaper).
P:
********************************************************
P seen here, wearing a dress which has all the colours of a rainbow and teased by random horny men on the street.
Men: Holi kaab hein? Kaab hein holi? (followed by wicked smirks)
P: J, they are eve-teasing and Eve is your wife. Stop them.
J (matter-of-factly): Tell them na, Holi is in March. Etobar jokhon jigesh korche (since they are asking so many times)
P:
***********************************************
P: It’s so late. I don’t think we’ll get a Taxi.
J: Wait. I’ll hide somewhere. You stand alone on the street. Remember “akeli ladki khuli hui tijori ki tarah hote hein”. Taxis are bound to stop. Then I’ll jump in.
P: This is how you use your wife???
J:  Yes. Now do what I tell you.
P:
P:
***************************************************
P complaining.
P: Someone told me my nose resembles that of a PUG!.
J: Pug? Vodafoner kutta, you mean?
P: Don’t make it worse. Just Pug.
J:  Who said? Tell him or her, I like honesty.
P:
P:
J: By the way, that’s your cutest feature. And the comparison makes it cuter.
P: J
************************************************

Similar conversation.
P: Your Mama (uncle) says my eyes are like a cow’s. Meanness is hereditary.
J: But it’s a compliment. Cows have beautiful eyes.
P: Never thought about it. Oh yes.
J: Told you. Better, do something about your double-chin before people start comparing it with that of a cow. (Gabbar Singh laugh follows).
P:
P:
**************************************************
P: Am I your Personal Secretary? Have you kept me ONLY to do all your work?
J: Yes. What else?
P:
J: You can also sleep with me. Like Personal Secretaries. (winks away to glory).
P:
********************************************
They flip through their wedding album.
J: With so many of your relatives surrounding me, reminds me of something.
P: What?
J: Gulliver’s Travels.
P: 
******************************************

In the midst of a serious discussion. P fuming.
J: You remember what was Oliver Twist’s best friend’s name?
P: How is that relevant? Anyways, whaat??
J: Master Bates.
P:
*********************************************
P: If you ever had to have an extramarital affair, whom would you want it with?
J: Tor ta suni agey. (First you say).
P: Srijit Mukherjee, may be?
J: Bah.
P: You?
J: You.
P: J
**********************************
Speechless!

14 comments:

  1. Funny..!! :D
    I could see P & J having the conversations..they make a lovely pair ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you for the certificate. "lovely pair"!!!..as if!

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  2. Replies
    1. thank you. thank you. thank you. now decide who is cuter of the two. prizes for the obvious answer!

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    2. X: I really miss u
      Y: Mrs hoy gele aar miss korbi na!
      X:
      ;)

      Delete
  3. lolzz... hilarious! good one!! ;)

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    Replies
    1. hilarious. yes, that's J for u. and P is the good one :)

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  4. Again Parama ...darun...keep it up!!!!!taxi wala ta best....

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    Replies
    1. ha ha...thank you. for reading. and tolerating! hugs

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  5. It was the best PJ I have ever read.........

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    Replies
    1. yes life itself is a PJ...when P and J are together

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  6. Bhishon bhishon cute! you guys are some pair!. :D :D

    ReplyDelete